You’ve always had a knack for landing six-figure gifts, but now your donor portfolio has grown to include ultrahigh-net-worth philanthropists with the capacity to give multimillion-dollar donations. That is a level of wealth you’ve never dealt with — and it is nerve-wracking.
“It’s really easy to be intimidated by the wealth and the number of people around the donor to the point where you can’t interact naturally,” says Rebecca Bowen, chief development officer at Panthera, a wildcat conservation group. “It’s like they’re not a real person.”
Interaction with all donors, regardless of how much they have to give, requires humility, respect, and a certain amount of strategy. Those capable of giving mega-gifts, however, often need much more time and attention to feel comfortable and confident enough to donate millions, say experts.
For one thing, these donors’ schedules are complex. They are sometimes surrounded by gatekeepers and advisers, and make no mistake: yours is not the only nonprofit clamoring for their time, attention, and largesse.
“The difference between middle donors and someone who can make an enormous gift is they’ve got key advisers around them,” says Ms. Bowen. “When you have lots of advisors involved you have complexity, but you also have lots of people you can ask.”
In other words, rather than viewing advisers as barriers to the donor or one more anxiety-inducing factor, development professionals should consider them as people who can provide a window into how the donor thinks, say fundraising experts. They can offer valuable insight into his or her temperament, preferred modes of communication, likes and dislikes.
“Those relationships have to be tailored, so I look to their advisers to help me figure out how the donors want to be dealt with,” says Ms. Bowen.
It’s also important to understand that these donors are working with you in their free time. While you get paid to interact with philanthropists Monday through Friday of every week, your donor does not.
“Put yourself in the place of that donor and appreciate what their day might be like,” says Dave Krepcho, president of Second Harvest Food Bank of Central Florida. “It may be filled with things that are 10 times the size of what you’ve got going on, so you can’t be tugging on their apron strings constantly.”
Experts say it comes down to basic respect for others and the professional wisdom to think carefully about your actions and behavior.
And don’t despair if you make a mistake with a wealthy donor. Most professionals who are new to working with the ultrawealthy will make at least one faux pas at some point, especially since every donor has a different sense of boundaries. When that happens, Ms. Bowen says it’s best to turn to your head of development for support.
“It’s the job of a good development manager to look out for you,” she says. “If you make a mistake or accidentally cross a boundary, a good manager will help you figure out how to self-correct.”