My Boss Doesn’t Listen to Me: Should I Quit?

On Becoming a Leader is a biweekly advice column in which Allison Fine, an author, consultant, and expert on nonprofit leadership and strategy, answers your questions about nonprofit careers and leadership. Have a question? Ask Ms. Fine using this form.

Q: I work in the programs department of an advocacy organization. I’ve been here for two years, and my boss doesn’t listen to any of my suggestions. Should I stay or go? — Janice, Washington, DC

A: I can’t make the decision of whether you should stay or go, Janice, but I can help you clarify whether this job is a good fit for you.

There are at least three reasons your boss may be unwilling to listen to your ideas:

1. You aren’t doing your regular job well enough.

2. You aren’t presenting your ideas well enough.

3. Your boss feels threatened by your initiative or by change of any kind.

The first two you can do something about. The third you can’t change, and you will either have to learn to live with it or look to leave.

The challenge you are facing is most likely a two-way street: a combination of the way you are presenting your ideas and how your boss is hearing them.

Here is what I suggest:

1. Check in with your boss about your performance. If you haven’t had a performance review in the last 12 months, you should request one.

2. If the organization doesn’t do performance reviews (sadly, not uncommon, but terrible), ask for a frank discussion of areas where you need to improve. During that conversation, you can raise the issue of feeling hamstrung and ask your boss for advice on how to reduce your frustration. (Warning: I did this once and was told, “Stop coming up with such stupid ideas!”)

3. Think about how you are presenting your ideas. Try them out on someone more conservative than you. Are they realistic, contained, and time-limited? Remember, most people are terrified of doing new things. How will your idea alleviate their fears, or at least not make them worse, while having a clear upside for the organization?

Good luck, Janice. Be constructive and positive, and if after trying these steps you find out that this isn’t the place for you, that’s OK, but give it your best try.