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The Basics of Meeting with Big Donors

By  Eden Stiffman
February 27, 2015

Every donor is different, and there are no hard-and-fast rules for meetings. The key is getting to know your donors’ passions and interests so that you can do your best connecting them with your organization and make the most of your time and theirs.

Here’s where to start.

Get to know the donor

Early meetings with prospective donors should focus on learning about their philanthropic mindset and where your organization is on their list of giving priorities.

“You may have all the research in the world, but there’s nothing like a face-to-face visit to really provide the kind of information that you can’t see from what you can find online,” says Jamie Roseman, senior associate vice president for development at Planned Parenthood of New York City.

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Every donor is different, and there are no hard-and-fast rules for meetings. The key is getting to know your donors’ passions and interests so that you can do your best connecting them with your organization and make the most of your time and theirs.

Here’s where to start.

Get to know the donor

Early meetings with prospective donors should focus on learning about their philanthropic mindset and where your organization is on their list of giving priorities.

“You may have all the research in the world, but there’s nothing like a face-to-face visit to really provide the kind of information that you can’t see from what you can find online,” says Jamie Roseman, senior associate vice president for development at Planned Parenthood of New York City.

Determining why someone gives is key to structuring future meetings.

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“I want to understand what it is that motivates them, what is it that drives them,” says Peter Drury, director of development at Splash, a water-relief organization based in Seattle.

That way, he’s able to highlight the programs and stories to tell that are the best fit.

Meet on the donor’s turf

You can learn a lot by where you meet someone, says Donna Frithsen, associate vice president for institutional advancement at Drexel University’s College of Medicine.

“It’s usually good to try to meet people in their office or in their home so that you can get a sense for who they are and their stature,” she says. “Pay attention to their space and what’s in it.”

Listen intently and avoid talking too much

“The biggest mistake that I see people making is going in and having a monologue about the organization,” says Amy Eisenstein, a fundraising consultant and the author of Major Gift Fundraising for Small Shops. “We have two ears and a mouth for a reason. We’re supposed to listen twice as much as we talk.”

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Ask open-ended questions, and inform the donor about your organization’s programs and goals in response to questions he or she asks you. But don’t feel you need to have every answer immediately.

“There’s nothing wrong with saying, ‘You know, I’m not sure. I’m going to find out and follow up with my colleagues and get back to you,’” Ms. Roseman says. Then be sure to get back to the donor with the information, she says.

Respect the donor’s time

Map out your visit based on how much time the donor is willing to give you.

Also keep in mind that time does not always equal money, says Laura Fredricks, a fundraising consultant and author of The Ask: How to Ask for Support for Your Nonprofit Cause, Creative Project, or Business Venture.

“We have a tendency to say, the more time we put into it, the more likely we’re going to get a higher gift,” Ms. Fredricks says. “And that equation very, very rarely works.”

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Meetings aren’t for everyone

It’s important to remember that a lot of major-donor work can be done in other ways, Ms. Roseman says. Be flexible—and patient.

“Not every donor likes or wants face-to-face meetings, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t develop a relationship over the phone or over email,” she says. “It’s really about meeting the donor where they’re at. And sometimes it takes a little while to build trust before a donor’s ready for a visit.”

Set reasonable expectations

Even if you have dazzling research on the prospect, don’t set your expectations too high. Some people don’t give, and others may select a single organization to support.

“People of great wealth don’t always give great wealth,” Ms. Fredricks says. “Even though they’ve made a million-plus gift to someone else doesn’t mean they’re going to do it with you.”

When Ms. Fredricks worked in development at Temple and Pace universities, she always had a working list of 25 donors to focus on immediately and another 25 to keep on her radar, an approach that ensured she always had high-potential leads to pursue.

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Ask for a donation when it feels right

Asking for a gift too soon or too late can hurt your chances of winning a major gift.

“Hitting that timing just right goes back to listening and observing,” says Margaret Turner, a senior major-gifts officer for the Smithsonian’s National Museum of African American History and Culture.

Ms. Turner recommends not asking for a gift on the first visit, but instead using that time to tell the donor about the organization and learn more about the donor’s interests.

Express your gratitude

“You’ve got to make people feel important—because they are,” Ms. Turner says. “None of us could do our jobs without our donors.”

Your acknowledgement systems for major donors have to be well executed, she says.

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“You cannot thank a donor enough,” she says. “I don’t care if it’s $1,000 or $50,000, every donor is important.”

Involve the whole team

While many organizations hire fundraisers to focus on major gifts, they shouldn’t give that person sole responsibility for the program, says Sunil Oommen, deputy director of major gifts at Amnesty International USA.

“The fundraiser is the coach,” Mr. Oommen says. “And the organizational head, board members, and senior staff are the players on the field who are the best ones to move prospects and donors toward making investments for their organization.”

“Sure, the fundraiser is out on the field, too, engaging and asking,” he says. “But if you want a Super Bowl-quality major-donor program, you’ve got to bring out these MVPs from the locker room.”

Read other items in this How to Make the Most of Your Meetings with Big Donors package.
We welcome your thoughts and questions about this article. Please email the editors or submit a letter for publication.
Major-Gift FundraisingFundraising from Individuals
Eden Stiffman
Eden Stiffman is a Chronicle senior writer.
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